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Bring It On
Sep. 16th, 2008 11:09 am(Let's see what kind of slant she tries to put on or story she tries to create out of this.)
It's been over three years since the break-up. Yes, in a lot of ways, I've moved on. No direct contact has helped. However, when I see you continually trashing my wife with lies when I know the truth, I've had enough. Sure, some will probably say I'm naturally defending a spouse and that I'm a milquetoast who will say anything that lines up with her view. She doesn't need to be defended by me, but I also know the truth. She and I have been through plenty of hell in the past when I didn't know things she knew, and, gasp, some examples of that can be laid at your feet.
You came to be with us, we thought, out of love. I didn't realize you were looking for another rescuer. And I don't play that role. Be an adult. When she turned out not to have a penis, you threw her aside. You had lied from day one. We expected you to contribute to the household, and got vitriol when we expected the same responsibilities from you we expect of ourselves. Or you closed yourself off in the room we let you use and drank yourself into a stupor. How many garbage bags full of empty beer cans did we pull out of that room when we cleaned up after you? That kind of attitude I'd expect from a teen, not a thirty-something.
You lied about the drinking. You cheated on us when you were out of town. You lied about your grandfather being ill. You ran up thousands in debt on our credit cards behind our backs. Sure, I've run up our credit cards in the past, but have worked on making amends and maturing in my attitude toward and handling of finances. You've tried to put it all behind you and make us out to be the bad guys (or at least her - I honestly have no idea how, or even if, you think of me anymore). Yes, I finally broke down and read your paper journal. Somehow to you that's worse than all that you did? Grow up. Look back at how long and how vehemently I defended you for using your journal when I hadn't looked in it. Then look at what it took to push me to find out for myself. A DUI. Purchases found in the car when we went to pick it up. Huge numbers of empty beer cans in what was your room. Stories that didn't correlate. All the complaints from others who had witnessed your behavior in the past started to make sense.
Calling someone else a drama queen? A "special snowflake"? Wow. Have you ever looked in a mirror? Claiming she's hounding you when you were the one to initiate contact after the break-up? Claiming that the contacts are bitchy when they're merely information and attempts at being civil? Do you have any grasp on reality?
Why am I writing this? Do I think you'll ever change? Not really. I just never bothered to say this to your face. I've avoided contact for this long so that I wouldn't blow up (I know my own temper - it's a very long fuse with a very big bomb on the end of it). The misrepresentation, the lies, the repeated behavior you're still getting away with because you've found a new set of acolytes has led me to write this. It may be futile, but it feels good to get it out of my system finally. I doubt you'll see it, although anyone else is welcome to point you in this general direction, hence the subject/title.
How long will it be before you need another escape? Another change of scenery? Another audience? What sort of ruin will you leave in your wake this time? The problem with building a convoluted web of lies is that it is very difficult to keep one's stories straight. I'm not even sure you know what the truth/reality is anymore. And you will slip up again, of that I'm fairly certain.
It's been over three years since the break-up. Yes, in a lot of ways, I've moved on. No direct contact has helped. However, when I see you continually trashing my wife with lies when I know the truth, I've had enough. Sure, some will probably say I'm naturally defending a spouse and that I'm a milquetoast who will say anything that lines up with her view. She doesn't need to be defended by me, but I also know the truth. She and I have been through plenty of hell in the past when I didn't know things she knew, and, gasp, some examples of that can be laid at your feet.
You came to be with us, we thought, out of love. I didn't realize you were looking for another rescuer. And I don't play that role. Be an adult. When she turned out not to have a penis, you threw her aside. You had lied from day one. We expected you to contribute to the household, and got vitriol when we expected the same responsibilities from you we expect of ourselves. Or you closed yourself off in the room we let you use and drank yourself into a stupor. How many garbage bags full of empty beer cans did we pull out of that room when we cleaned up after you? That kind of attitude I'd expect from a teen, not a thirty-something.
You lied about the drinking. You cheated on us when you were out of town. You lied about your grandfather being ill. You ran up thousands in debt on our credit cards behind our backs. Sure, I've run up our credit cards in the past, but have worked on making amends and maturing in my attitude toward and handling of finances. You've tried to put it all behind you and make us out to be the bad guys (or at least her - I honestly have no idea how, or even if, you think of me anymore). Yes, I finally broke down and read your paper journal. Somehow to you that's worse than all that you did? Grow up. Look back at how long and how vehemently I defended you for using your journal when I hadn't looked in it. Then look at what it took to push me to find out for myself. A DUI. Purchases found in the car when we went to pick it up. Huge numbers of empty beer cans in what was your room. Stories that didn't correlate. All the complaints from others who had witnessed your behavior in the past started to make sense.
Calling someone else a drama queen? A "special snowflake"? Wow. Have you ever looked in a mirror? Claiming she's hounding you when you were the one to initiate contact after the break-up? Claiming that the contacts are bitchy when they're merely information and attempts at being civil? Do you have any grasp on reality?
Why am I writing this? Do I think you'll ever change? Not really. I just never bothered to say this to your face. I've avoided contact for this long so that I wouldn't blow up (I know my own temper - it's a very long fuse with a very big bomb on the end of it). The misrepresentation, the lies, the repeated behavior you're still getting away with because you've found a new set of acolytes has led me to write this. It may be futile, but it feels good to get it out of my system finally. I doubt you'll see it, although anyone else is welcome to point you in this general direction, hence the subject/title.
How long will it be before you need another escape? Another change of scenery? Another audience? What sort of ruin will you leave in your wake this time? The problem with building a convoluted web of lies is that it is very difficult to keep one's stories straight. I'm not even sure you know what the truth/reality is anymore. And you will slip up again, of that I'm fairly certain.
